Thursday, November 13, 2008

Title: THis 5 words..

hey all,

hope you guys are doing fine out there..know the weather been gloomy and rainy lately..causing lil hassle here and there...havent been so good myself..this nose been dripping since last wk...listenin to bon jovi ...i'll be there for you..great song, great singer and band...deep meaning..

was on course the whole day and was wif my colleague luqman the whole day..after the course finished, grab 6 donuts for my dear..i ate one and luqman ate one more before waiting for him to finished his stick (1st tie eating donut donut) ...and after that rushed home back to my dear...

on the way back, luqman and i were talking about his marriage life..i looked at him and this is a guy about my age...goin to be a father soon..nice guy i haf to say..he alighted at outram as he was meeting his wife..n i continued my way back home..with the donuts in my hands...i know my dear loves the white cream donuts from the shop but unfornately there was only one left...
well,one is better than nothing..cant wait to see her smile when i get back..dat was my thought..

on the way, thoughts of my dear was the only thing dat came to mind...she didnt go to work today..n wondered if shes ok..if shes unwell..or smthin is bothering her...for the whole day, she was in my mind basically...like i always say..shes the 1st thing on my mind in the morning and the last..tucking her in n seeing the way she slept always melt me...

the other day.. was unwell, n she actually made a maggee and took care of me..dat magee even if its just a maggee, it means a lot to me...she tucked me in n made dat vick steam for me to inhale as she knew i had blocked nose..but dats not it...as i was sleepin on her bed dat day...i woke up to the darkness only to find her sleepin in a squeezy sofa in a hall...curling up...n dat was it!!!she got me there!!

looking at how she cuddle herself up in dat sofa as i was sleeping on her bed...got me..totally got me!!this is one woman that sacrifies her comfort..caring and i know i would like to love her more and more...i dont know how to describe the feeling actually..you know that feeling that you know you are the luckiest guy and you love this woman soo much..i told luqman about it actually earlier cos we were talking about how much we love our partner even if they get on our nerves at times..lol..

well,to share with the rest of the world...my dear, she is one woman that i fall over and over again each time she calls out for me,she smiles at me...a touch that i eases out any fear and calm the battle inside me as i go out to this cold world...some times, i dunoe, i have feeling that she doubt me..but she the one and only woman that i gave everything to..this heart right, has been left open like an open target, slowly she pulls the secrets in there,heals hurt...god,soo much i can say, i do write down the thigs about her in a book..for her..smthin i'll give when the time is right..so she knows..how beautiful she is...

anyway, i know that some would say...the entry is a lil mushy..but well...haha..what can i say?she got me..i fall over and over again n im addicted to her..8 more mths..8 more mths..and i give her the rest of eveything...everything there is in me..means nothing when i dont share it...

to my dear,

dont ever doubt me...evrything there is to me is right in front of you...there no one that i want more than you...above everything else...i love you.

me

Rest My CaSe at 7:57 PM



Sunday, November 09, 2008

Title:Dont..

i just like to write these down...

1)Dont think that i dont care or ignorant about some things..im just watching and monitoring a situation before reacting..

2) Dont think that i dont know what some ppl are doing...im just seeing how far they will go

3) Dont think that i dont get hurt by their actions or say...Usually,i just swallow the pain and numb the pain..

4) Dont think that im not thinking...i think a lot...too much some say..

5) Dont think that a smile is always smile...look into the eyes to know the real story..it is the window to the soul..

6) Dont tink that i know or have the answer to everything..i just try my best to find out more and make things happens..

7) Dont think that i dont get angry..I just choose to silent rather than say things that would hurt anyone..

8) Dont think i dont have emotions..I just been supressing them...be known that while protecting feelings of my loved ones, i usually end up hurting myself more..

9) Dont think im always cool and calm..Inside i am battling a war..

JUSt dont think, dont think...dont make assumption and presumption..

space out,

me

Rest My CaSe at 9:30 AM



Saturday, November 08, 2008

Title:Dat dream again...

barely got a wink last nite..havin a flu and fever..pop some flu and fever pill earlier on in hopin i wld fall asleep..but cldnt...instead kept waking up few times in the middle of the nite..remember this particular dream..where i died..AGAIN..hit by a car..n there were flashes of growing up years,moments with my dear,times with my mom, dad ,family basically..and b4 eventually seeing myself being carried at my funeral...where i c all my love ones..mom was quiet but cld see the sad look..my der was sobbin slowly,sis too..before i eventually for some reason..just woke up after hearing some1 calling me..woke up and there was mom opening the windows..looked at the clock n its 7am..

still feelin the fever i brushed my teeth and read some things about work n listenin to music...already had a disagreement wif my mom..its funny somehow..that wheneva i get sick, she always say that it my fault..sigh..will be having breakfast wif yan,my cuzz to talk about his policies and advise accordingly..

as im typing this..few things come to me..the dream..whats the meaing of seeing yourself dying in a dream?not once,not twice but couple of times..i remembered that my dears frd had a dream of being tied up by a black snake..what is it tryin to say?..we always hear ppl say dereams are signs of smthin rite?...anyone to fill the puzzle?.hmm..dun wan to think soo much so im gonna just take it as im stressed,sick and a lil on the down side...n thats y...which i am..

2nd...had a talk wif aliffy n lynn couple of days back...n lynn said smthin about "why cant things be like how they used to be?if you can talk to their partner nicely back then,why not now?"...dat kinda just came to mind..."why cant some things be like how they used to be for couples...what brought each couple together was there was the fact of they found smthin they like or love about their partner..during the courting years, we would talk to each other with nice words,respect and many more..but over times all these seems to fade..replaced by harsh words,coldness and many more...maybe taking for granted that our partners will always be there...

i've heard lots of break up stories,one cheating on another,be it bf-gf, engaged or even married ones...scary world out there..where a broken heart mite change a ones life n the way they view things..

anyway,love to write more but gotta rush now..talk again later probly at nite?..so wish me a good day ahead as things havent been "up" for me...enjoy the day for all those that is reading this.


space out..

me

Rest My CaSe at 7:25 AM



Saturday, November 01, 2008

Title:My Internet time..

hey all...

hows evryone been doing?...pretty good on my side..started smthin new and soo determine and eager to see what i can do...basically skys the limit right..yup..so reach as high as you can but keep the feet on the ground...1st wk at wrk is pretty gd and positive actually...cant wait to meet more ppl and offer my services to them..that aside for now..

yeah...a neighbour was telling me that how come i dont check my friendster or similar sites anymore..or join all the others social network site..

well..to be honest..im not into these things..at least no longer at this age..plus work and all that..i usually spend my internet time doing my work..reading things i need to know..check my mail and all that..only once in a blue moon would i actually update or even log on to these sites..

like i said..just not into it anymore..be in friendster, facebook or any other out there...at this age..i rather focus on other things..esp work,career and rather use the net for smthin good...like reading things i need to know, check some stuffs or etc etc...

my neighbour actually asked ," your married? i saw your friendster profile"...well..i just laugh at her...and told her..."no but im engage"..then she continued.."how come your profile said your married?"...

"official indication that im off the market"..lol...and we both laugh...well, this is a neigbour of mine whom i was soo shocked when i found out that she got a son oredi..i know shes married but son..attended her wedding back then..but son?hmm..where have i been?..lol..i didnt know that she got a child already..haha..o well..

same as ppl that congrats me on my "marriage"...haha..1stly,thank you i would say..dont be shocked if you get a wedding card from me..haha..for now, just doakan the best for me in this phase of life..

anyway, like i said..if any of you guys need to drop me a msg or smthin..important ones that is...theres always the email..haha..if you drop me thru all these sites..just be prepared that u wait a longgggggggggggggggggg time for a reply..like i said..not into these anymore..grow up,im much more focused in myself and i grew out of these things..orng melayu ckp "dah tak penting anymore.aku tahu aku keje betul2,jaga orng2 yng tersyng and pakai net utk benda2 yng perlu sahaja"...haha...

so b4 i take my left for today..

to those that congratulate me...haha..thank you..congratulate me again next july..:) (hint hint)..

to my dear,

im focused on my work and building a better future for us..thats my goal..you will be rewarded in future for the patience..i promise you this..the things that you want n all dat...the time will come when i get you all that..i am working hard for us..i thank you for your patience and insyallah wif hard work and semua berkat..we will make it..i love you.

space out all..

me

Rest My CaSe at 3:19 PM